Alls Wel that ends Well Read online

  Since I have lost, have lov'd, was in mine eye

  The dust that did offend it.

  KING. Well excus'd.

  That thou didst love her, strikes some scores away

  From the great compt; but love that comes too late,

  Like a remorseful pardon slowly carried,

  To the great sender turns a sour offence,

  Crying 'That's good that's gone.' Our rash faults

  Make trivial price of serious things we have,

  Not knowing them until we know their grave.

  Oft our displeasures, to ourselves unjust,

  Destroy our friends, and after weep their dust;

  Our own love waking cries to see what's done,

  While shameful hate sleeps out the afternoon.

  Be this sweet Helen's knell. And now forget her.

  Send forth your amorous token for fair Maudlin.

  The main consents are had; and here we'll stay

  To see our widower's second marriage-day.

  COUNTESS. Which better than the first, O dear heaven, bless!

  Or, ere they meet, in me, O nature, cesse!

  LAFEU. Come on, my son, in whom my house's name

  Must be digested; give a favour from you,

  To sparkle in the spirits of my daughter,

  That she may quickly come.

  [BERTRAM gives a ring]

  By my old beard,

  And ev'ry hair that's on 't, Helen, that's dead,

  Was a sweet creature; such a ring as this,

  The last that e'er I took her leave at court,

  I saw upon her finger.

  BERTRAM. Hers it was not.

  KING. Now, pray you, let me see it; for mine eye,

  While I was speaking, oft was fasten'd to't.

  This ring was mine; and when I gave it Helen

  I bade her, if her fortunes ever stood

  Necessitied to help, that by this token

  I would relieve her. Had you that craft to reave her

  Of what should stead her most?

  BERTRAM. My gracious sovereign,

  Howe'er it pleases you to take it so,

  The ring was never hers.

  COUNTESS. Son, on my life,

  I have seen her wear it; and she reckon'd it

  At her life's rate.

  LAFEU. I am sure I saw her wear it.

  BERTRAM. You are deceiv'd, my lord; she never saw it.

  In Florence was it from a casement thrown me,

  Wrapp'd in a paper, which contain'd the name

  Of her that threw it. Noble she was, and thought

  I stood engag'd; but when I had subscrib'd

  To mine own fortune, and inform'd her fully

  I could not answer in that course of honour

  As she had made the overture, she ceas'd,

  In heavy satisfaction, and would never

  Receive the ring again.

  KING. Plutus himself,

  That knows the tinct and multiplying med'cine,

  Hath not in nature's mystery more science

  Than I have in this ring. 'Twas mine, 'twas Helen's,

  Whoever gave it you. Then, if you know

  That you are well acquainted with yourself,

  Confess 'twas hers, and by what rough enforcement

  You got it from her. She call'd the saints to surety

  That she would never put it from her finger

  Unless she gave it to yourself in bed-

  Where you have never come— or sent it us

  Upon her great disaster.

  BERTRAM. She never saw it.

  KING. Thou speak'st it falsely, as I love mine honour;

  And mak'st conjectural fears to come into me

  Which I would fain shut out. If it should prove

  That thou art so inhuman— 'twill not prove so.

  And yet I know not— thou didst hate her deadly,

  And she is dead; which nothing, but to close

  Her eyes myself, could win me to believe

  More than to see this ring. Take him away.

  [GUARDS seize BERTRAM]

  My fore-past proofs, howe'er the matter fall,

  Shall tax my fears of little vanity,

  Having vainly fear'd too little. Away with him.

  We'll sift this matter further.

  BERTRAM. If you shall prove

  This ring was ever hers, you shall as easy

  Prove that I husbanded her bed in Florence,

  Where she yet never was. Exit, guarded

  KING. I am wrapp'd in dismal thinkings.

  Enter a GENTLEMAN

  GENTLEMAN. Gracious sovereign,

  Whether I have been to blame or no, I know not:

  Here's a petition from a Florentine,

  Who hath, for four or five removes, come short

  To tender it herself. I undertook it,

  Vanquish'd thereto by the fair grace and speech

  Of the poor suppliant, who by this, I know,

  Is here attending; her business looks in her

  With an importing visage; and she told me

  In a sweet verbal brief it did concern

  Your Highness with herself.

  KING. [Reads the letter] 'Upon his many protestations to marry me

  when his wife was dead, I blush to say it, he won me. Now is the

  Count Rousillon a widower; his vows are forfeited to me, and my

  honour's paid to him. He stole from Florence, taking no leave,

  and I follow him to his country for justice. Grant it me, O King!

  in you it best lies; otherwise a seducer flourishes, and a poor

  maid is undone.

  DIANA CAPILET.'

  LAFEU. I will buy me a son-in-law in a fair, and toll for this.

  I'll none of him.

  KING. The heavens have thought well on thee, Lafeu,

  To bring forth this discov'ry. Seek these suitors.

  Go speedily, and bring again the Count.

  Exeunt ATTENDANTS

  I am afeard the life of Helen, lady,

  Was foully snatch'd.

  COUNTESS. Now, justice on the doers!

  Enter BERTRAM, guarded

  KING. I wonder, sir, sith wives are monsters to you.

  And that you fly them as you swear them lordship,

  Yet you desire to marry.

  Enter WIDOW and DIANA

  What woman's that?

  DIANA. I am, my lord, a wretched Florentine,

  Derived from the ancient Capilet.

  My suit, as I do understand, you know,

  And therefore know how far I may be pitied.

  WIDOW. I am her mother, sir, whose age and honour

  Both suffer under this complaint we bring,

  And both shall cease, without your remedy.

  KING. Come hither, Count; do you know these women?

  BERTRAM. My lord, I neither can nor will deny

  But that I know them. Do they charge me further?

  DIANA. Why do you look so strange upon your wife?

  BERTRAM. She's none of mine, my lord.

  DIANA. If you shall marry,

  You give away this hand, and that is mine;

  You give away heaven's vows, and those are mine;

  You give away myself, which is known mine;

  For I by vow am so embodied yours

  That she which marries you must marry me,

  Either both or none.

  LAFEU. [To BERTRAM] Your reputation comes too short for

  my daughter; you are no husband for her.

  BERTRAM. My lord, this is a fond and desp'rate creature

  Whom sometime I have laugh'd with. Let your Highness

  Lay a more noble thought upon mine honour

  Than for to think that I would sink it here.

  KING. Sir, for my thoughts, you have them ill to friend

  Till your deeds gain them. Fairer prove your honour

  Than in my thought it lies!


  DIANA. Good my lord,

  Ask him upon his oath if he does think

  He had not my virginity.

  KING. What say'st thou to her?

  BERTRAM. She's impudent, my lord,

  And was a common gamester to the camp.

  DIANA. He does me wrong, my lord; if I were so

  He might have bought me at a common price.

  Do not believe him. o, behold this ring,

  Whose high respect and rich validity

  Did lack a parallel; yet, for all that,

  He gave it to a commoner o' th' camp,

  If I be one.

  COUNTESS. He blushes, and 'tis it.

  Of six preceding ancestors, that gem

  Conferr'd by testament to th' sequent issue,

  Hath it been ow'd and worn. This is his wife:

  That ring's a thousand proofs.

  KING. Methought you said

  You saw one here in court could witness it.

  DIANA. I did, my lord, but loath am to produce

  So bad an instrument; his name's Parolles.

  LAFEU. I saw the man to-day, if man he be.

  KING. Find him, and bring him hither. Exit an ATTENDANT

  BERTRAM. What of him?

  He's quoted for a most perfidious slave,

  With all the spots o' th' world tax'd and debauch'd,

  Whose nature sickens but to speak a truth.

  Am I or that or this for what he'll utter

  That will speak anything?

  KING. She hath that ring of yours.

  BERTRAM. I think she has. Certain it is I lik'd her,

  And boarded her i' th' wanton way of youth.

  She knew her distance, and did angle for me,

  Madding my eagerness with her restraint,

  As all impediments in fancy's course

  Are motives of more fancy; and, in fine,

  Her infinite cunning with her modern grace

  Subdu'd me to her rate. She got the ring;

  And I had that which any inferior might

  At market-price have bought.

  DIANA. I must be patient.

  You that have turn'd off a first so noble wife

  May justly diet me. I pray you yet-

  Since you lack virtue, I will lose a husband-

  Send for your ring, I will return it home,

  And give me mine again.

  BERTRAM. I have it not.

  KING. What ring was yours, I pray you?

  DIANA. Sir, much like

  The same upon your finger.

  KING. Know you this ring? This ring was his of late.

  DIANA. And this was it I gave him, being abed.

  KING. The story, then, goes false you threw it him

  Out of a casement.

  DIANA. I have spoke the truth.

  Enter PAROLLES

  BERTRAM. My lord, I do confess the ring was hers.

  KING. You boggle shrewdly; every feather starts you.

  Is this the man you speak of?

  DIANA. Ay, my lord.

  KING. Tell me, sirrah-but tell me true I charge you,

  Not fearing the displeasure of your master,

  Which, on your just proceeding, I'll keep off-

  By him and by this woman here what know you?

  PAROLLES. So please your Majesty, my master hath been an honourable

  gentleman; tricks he hath had in him, which gentlemen have.

  KING. Come, come, to th' purpose. Did he love this woman?

  PAROLLES. Faith, sir, he did love her; but how?

  KING. How, I pray you?

  PAROLLES. He did love her, sir, as a gentleman loves a woman.

  KING. How is that?

  PAROLLES. He lov'd her, sir, and lov'd her not.

  KING. As thou art a knave and no knave.

  What an equivocal companion is this!

  PAROLLES. I am a poor man, and at your Majesty's command.

  LAFEU. He's a good drum, my lord, but a naughty orator.

  DIANA. Do you know he promis'd me marriage?

  PAROLLES. Faith, I know more than I'll speak.

  KING. But wilt thou not speak all thou know'st?

  PAROLLES. Yes, so please your Majesty. I did go between them, as I

  said; but more than that, he loved her-for indeed he was mad for

  her, and talk'd of Satan, and of Limbo, and of Furies, and I know

  not what. Yet I was in that credit with them at that time that I

  knew of their going to bed; and of other motions, as promising

  her marriage, and things which would derive me ill will to speak

  of; therefore I will not speak what I know.

  KING. Thou hast spoken all already, unless thou canst say they are

  married; but thou art too fine in thy evidence; therefore stand

  aside.

  This ring, you say, was yours?

  DIANA. Ay, my good lord.

  KING. Where did you buy it? Or who gave it you?

  DIANA. It was not given me, nor I did not buy it.

  KING. Who lent it you?

  DIANA. It was not lent me neither.

  KING. Where did you find it then?

  DIANA. I found it not.

  KING. If it were yours by none of all these ways,

  How could you give it him?

  DIANA. I never gave it him.

  LAFEU. This woman's an easy glove, my lord; she goes of and on at

  pleasure.

  KING. This ring was mine, I gave it his first wife.

  DIANA. It might be yours or hers, for aught I know.

  KING. Take her away, I do not like her now;

  To prison with her. And away with him.

  Unless thou tell'st me where thou hadst this ring,

  Thou diest within this hour.

  DIANA. I'll never tell you.

  KING. Take her away.

  DIANA. I'll put in bail, my liege.

  KING. I think thee now some common customer.

  DIANA. By Jove, if ever I knew man, 'twas you.

  KING. Wherefore hast thou accus'd him all this while?

  DIANA. Because he's guilty, and he is not guilty.

  He knows I am no maid, and he'll swear to't:

  I'll swear I am a maid, and he knows not.

  Great King, I am no strumpet, by my life;

  I am either maid, or else this old man's wife.

  [Pointing to LAFEU]

  KING. She does abuse our ears; to prison with her.

  DIANA. Good mother, fetch my bail. Stay, royal sir;

  Exit WIDOW

  The jeweller that owes the ring is sent for,

  And he shall surety me. But for this lord

  Who hath abus'd me as he knows himself,

  Though yet he never harm'd me, here I quit him.

  He knows himself my bed he hath defil'd;

  And at that time he got his wife with child.

  Dead though she be, she feels her young one kick;

  So there's my riddle: one that's dead is quick-

  And now behold the meaning.

  Re-enter WIDOW with HELENA

  KING. Is there no exorcist

  Beguiles the truer office of mine eyes?

  Is't real that I see?

  HELENA. No, my good lord;

  'Tis but the shadow of a wife you see,

  The name and not the thing.

  BERTRAM. Both, both; o, pardon!

  HELENA. O, my good lord, when I was like this maid,

  I found you wondrous kind. There is your ring,

  And, look you, here's your letter. This it says:

  'When from my finger you can get this ring,

  And are by me with child,' etc. This is done.

  Will you be mine now you are doubly won?

  BERTRAM. If she, my liege, can make me know this clearly,

  I'll love her dearly, ever, ever dearly.

  HELENA. If it appear not plain, and prove untrue,

  Deadly divorce step bet
ween me and you!

  O my dear mother, do I see you living?

  LAFEU. Mine eyes smell onions; I shall weep anon. [To PAROLLES]

  Good Tom Drum, lend me a handkercher. So, I

  thank thee. Wait on me home, I'll make sport with thee;

  let thy curtsies alone, they are scurvy ones.

  KING. Let us from point to point this story know,

  To make the even truth in pleasure flow.

  [To DIANA] If thou beest yet a fresh uncropped flower,

  Choose thou thy husband, and I'll pay thy dower;

  For I can guess that by thy honest aid

  Thou kept'st a wife herself, thyself a maid.-

  Of that and all the progress, more and less,

  Resolvedly more leisure shall express.

  All yet seems well; and if it end so meet,

  The bitter past, more welcome is the sweet. [Flourish]

  EPILOGUE

  EPILOGUE.

  KING. The King's a beggar, now the play is done.

  All is well ended if this suit be won,

  That you express content; which we will pay

  With strife to please you, day exceeding day.

  Ours be your patience then, and yours our parts;

  Your gentle hands lend us, and take our hearts.

  Exeunt omnes

  THE END

  FB2 document info

  Document ID: 3b7fc61e-5674-4369-9f8d-5e6e29ab8d97

  Document version: 1

  Document creation date: 2006-04-18

  Created using: FB Tools software

  Document authors :

  Rustam

  Document history:

  FB2 made by Rust

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