The Taming of the Shrew Read online

  In gait and countenance surely like a father.

  LUCENTIO And what of him, Tranio?

  TRANIO If he be credulous and trust my tale,

  I'll make him glad to seem71 Vincentio,

  And give assurance to Baptista Minola

  As if he were the right Vincentio.

  Take in your love, and then let me alone74.

  [Exeunt Lucentio and Bianca]

  Enter a Pedant

  PEDANT God save you, sir!

  TRANIO And you, sir! You are welcome.

  Travel you far on, or are you at the furthest?

  PEDANT Sir, at the furthest for a week or two,

  But then up further, and as far as Rome,

  And so to Tripoli, if God lend me life.

  TRANIO What countryman81, I pray?

  PEDANT Of Mantua.

  TRANIO Of Mantua, sir? Marry, God forbid!

  And come to Padua, careless of your life?

  PEDANT My life, sir? How, I pray? For that goes hard85.

  TRANIO 'Tis death for anyone in Mantua

  To come to Padua. Know you not the cause?

  Your ships are stayed88 at Venice, and the duke,

  For89 private quarrel 'twixt your duke and him,

  Hath published90 and proclaimed it openly.

  'Tis marvel91, but that you are but newly come,

  You might have heard it else proclaimed about.

  PEDANT Alas, sir, it is worse for me than so93,

  For I have bills for money by exchange94

  From Florence and must here deliver them.

  TRANIO Well, sir, to do you courtesy,

  This will I do, and this I will advise you:

  First tell me, have you ever been at Pisa?

  PEDANT Ay, sir, in Pisa have I often been,

  Pisa renowned for grave citizens.

  TRANIO Among them know you one Vincentio?

  PEDANT I know him not, but I have heard of him,

  A merchant of incomparable wealth.

  TRANIO He is my father, sir, and sooth to say,

  In count'nance somewhat doth resemble you.

  BIONDELLO As much as an apple doth an oyster, and all one106.

  Aside

  TRANIO To save your life in this extremity,

  This favour will I do you for his sake,

  And think it not the worst of all your fortunes

  That you are like to Sir Vincentio.

  His name and credit111 shall you undertake,

  And in my house you shall be friendly lodged.

  Look that you take upon you as you should113.

  You understand me, sir. So shall you stay

  Till you have done your business in the city.

  If this be court'sy, sir, accept of it.

  PEDANT O, sir, I do, and will repute117 you ever

  The patron of my life and liberty.

  TRANIO Then go with me to make the matter good119.

  This, by the way, I let you understand.

  My father is here looked for121 every day,

  To pass assurance of a dower in marriage

  'Twixt me and one Baptista's daughter here.

  In all these circumstances I'll instruct you.

  Go with me to clothe you as becomes125 you.

  Exeunt

  Act 4 Scene 1

  running scene 7

  Location: a country estate

  Enter Katherina and Grumio

  GRUMIO No, no, forsooth, I dare not for my life.

  KATE The more my wrong2, the more his spite appears.

  What, did he marry me to famish me?

  Beggars that come unto my father's door

  Upon entreaty have a present5 alms,

  If not, elsewhere they meet with charity.

  But I, who never knew how to entreat,

  Nor never needed that I should entreat,

  Am starved for meat9, giddy for lack of sleep,

  With oaths kept waking and with brawling fed.

  And that which spites11 me more than all these wants,

  He does it under name of perfect love,

  As who13 should say, if I should sleep or eat,

  'Twere deadly sickness or else present death.

  I prithee go and get me some repast,

  I care not what, so16 it be wholesome food.

  GRUMIO What say you to a neat's17 foot?

  KATE 'Tis passing good, I prithee let me have it.

  GRUMIO I fear it is too choleric19 a meat.

  How say you to a fat tripe finely broiled20?

  KATE I like it well, good Grumio, fetch it me.

  GRUMIO I cannot tell22, I fear 'tis choleric.

  What say you to a piece of beef and mustard?

  KATE A dish that I do love to feed upon.

  GRUMIO Ay, but the mustard is too hot a little.

  KATE Why then, the beef, and let the mustard rest.

  GRUMIO Nay then, I will not. You shall have the mustard,

  Or else you get no beef of Grumio.

  KATE Then both, or one, or anything thou wilt.

  GRUMIO Why then, the mustard without the beef.

  KATE Go, get thee gone, thou false deluding slave

  Beats him

  That feed'st me with the very32 name of meat.

  Sorrow on thee and all the pack of you

  That triumph thus upon my misery.

  Go, get thee gone, I say.

  Enter Petruchio and Hortensio with meat

  PETRUCHIO How fares my Kate? What, sweeting36, all amort?

  HORTENSIO Mistress, what cheer37?

  KATE Faith, as cold38 as can be.

  PETRUCHIO Pluck up thy spirits, look cheerfully upon me.

  Here love, thou see'st how diligent I am

  To dress thy meat myself and bring it thee.

  I am sure, sweet Kate, this kindness merits thanks.

  What, not a word? Nay then thou lov'st it not,

  And all my pains is sorted to no proof44.

  Here, take away this dish.

  KATE I pray you let it stand46.

  PETRUCHIO The poorest service is repaid with thanks,

  And so shall mine, before you touch the meat.

  KATE I thank you, sir.

  HORTENSIO Signior Petruchio, fie, you are to blame50.

  Come, mistress Kate, I'll bear you company.

  PETRUCHIO Eat it up all, Hortensio, if thou lovest me.

  Aside

  Much good do it unto thy gentle heart!--

  Hortensio takes plate and does not let Kate eat

  Kate, eat apace54. And now, my honey love,

  Will we return unto thy father's house

  And revel it as bravely56 as the best,

  With silken coats and caps and golden rings,

  With ruffs58 and cuffs and farthingales and things,

  With scarfs and fans and double change of bravery,

  With amber bracelets, beads and all this knavery60.

  What, hast thou dined? The tailor stays thy leisure,

  To deck thy body with his ruffling treasure62.

  Enter Tailor [with a gown]

  Come, tailor, let us see these ornaments.

  Enter Haberdasher [with a hat]

  Lay forth the gown.-- What news with you, sir?

  HABERDASHER Here is the cap your worship did bespeak65.

  PETRUCHIO Why, this was moulded on a porringer66,

  A velvet dish. Fie, fie, 'tis lewd67 and filthy.

  Why, 'tis a cockle68 or a walnut-shell,

  A knack, a toy, a trick69, a baby's cap.

  Away with it! Come, let me have a bigger.

  KATE I'll have no bigger. This doth fit the time71,

  And gentlewomen wear such caps as these.

  PETRUCHIO When you are gentle73, you shall have one too,

  And not till then.

  HORTENSIO That will not be in haste.

  Aside

  KATE Why, sir, I trust I may have leave to speak,

  And speak I will.
I am no child, no babe.

  Your betters have endured me78 say my mind,

  And if you cannot, best you stop your ears.

  My tongue will tell the anger of my heart,

  Or else my heart concealing it will break,

  And rather than it shall, I will be free

  Even to the uttermost, as I please, in words.

  PETRUCHIO Why, thou say'st true. It is a paltry cap,

  A custard-coffin85, a bauble, a silken pie.

  I love thee well in that thou lik'st it not.

  KATE Love me or love me not, I like the cap,

  And it I will have, or I will have none.

  [Exit Haberdasher]

  PETRUCHIO Thy gown? Why, ay. Come, tailor, let us see't.

  O mercy, God! What masquing stuff90 is here?

  What's this? A sleeve? 'Tis like a demi-cannon91.

  What, up and down92, carved like an apple tart?

  Here's snip and nip and cut and slish and slash,

  Like to a censer94 in a barber's shop.

  Why, what o'devil's name, tailor, call'st thou this?

  HORTENSIO I see she's like to have neither cap nor gown.

  Aside

  TAILOR You bid me make it orderly and well,

  According to the fashion and the time.

  PETRUCHIO Marry, and did99. But if you be remembered,

  I did not bid you mar100 it to the time.

  Go, hop me over every kennel home101,

  For you shall hop without my custom, sir:

  I'll none of it. Hence, make your best of it103.

  KATE I never saw a better-fashioned gown,

  More quaint105, more pleasing, nor more commendable.

  Belike106 you mean to make a puppet of me.

  PETRUCHIO Why, true, he means to make a puppet of thee.

  TAILOR She says your worship means to make a puppet of her.

  PETRUCHIO O monstrous arrogance! Thou liest, thou thread, thou thimble,

  Thou yard110, three-quarters, half-yard, quarter, nail!

  Thou flea, thou nit, thou winter-cricket thou!

  Braved112 in mine own house with a skein of thread?

  Away, thou rag, thou quantity113, thou remnant,

  Or I shall so be-mete114 thee with thy yard

  As thou shalt think on prating115 whilst thou liv'st!

  I tell thee, I, that thou hast marred her gown.

  TAILOR Your worship is deceived. The gown is made

  Just as my master had direction.

  Grumio gave order how it should be done.

  GRUMIO I gave him no order, I gave him the stuff120.

  TAILOR But how did you desire it should be made?

  GRUMIO Marry, sir, with needle and thread.

  TAILOR But did you not request to have it cut?

  GRUMIO Thou hast faced124 many things.

  TAILOR I have.

  GRUMIO Face not me. Thou hast braved126 many men, brave

  not me; I will neither be faced nor braved. I say unto thee, I

  bid thy master cut out the gown, but I did not bid him cut it

  to pieces. Ergo129, thou liest.

  TAILOR Why, here is the note of the fashion to testify.

  Shows bill

  PETRUCHIO Read it.

  GRUMIO The note lies in's throat132, if he say I said so.

  TAILOR 'Imprimis, a loose-bodied gown133.'

  Reads

  GRUMIO Master, if ever I said loose-bodied gown, sew me in

  the skirts of it, and beat me to death with a bottom135 of brown

  thread: I said a gown.

  PETRUCHIO Proceed.

  TAILOR 'With a small compassed138 cape.'

  Reads

  GRUMIO I confess the cape.

  TAILOR 'With a trunk140 sleeve.'

  Reads

  GRUMIO I confess two sleeves.

  TAILOR 'The sleeves curiously142 cut.'

  Reads

  PETRUCHIO Ay, there's the villainy.

  GRUMIO Error i'th'bill144, sir, error i'th'bill. I commanded the

  sleeves should be cut out and sewed up again, and that I'll

  prove upon thee146, though thy little finger be armed in a

  thimble.

  TAILOR This is true that I say, an148 I had thee in place where,

  thou shouldst know it.

  GRUMIO I am for thee straight150. Take thou the bill, give me thy

  mete-yard151, and spare not me.

  HORTENSIO God-a-mercy, Grumio, then he shall have no odds152.

  PETRUCHIO Well, sir, in brief, the gown is not for me.

  GRUMIO You are i'th'right, sir, 'tis for my mistress.

  PETRUCHIO Go, take it up unto thy master's use155.

  GRUMIO Villain, not for thy life. Take up my mistress' gown

  for thy master's use!

  PETRUCHIO Why, sir, what's your conceit158 in that?

  GRUMIO O, sir, the conceit is deeper than you think for159:

  Take up my mistress' gown to his master's use!

  O, fie, fie, fie!

  PETRUCHIO Hortensio, say thou wilt see the tailor paid.--

  Aside to Hortensio

  Go take it hence. Be gone, and say no more.

  To the Tailor

  HORTENSIO Tailor, I'll pay thee for thy gown tomorrow.

  Aside to the Tailor

  Take no unkindness of165 his hasty words.

  Away, I say, commend me to thy master.

  Exit Tailor

  PETRUCHIO Well, come, my Kate. We will unto your father's

  Even in these honest mean habiliments168:

  Our purses shall be proud169, our garments poor,

  For 'tis the mind that makes the body rich,

  And as the sun breaks through the darkest clouds,

  So honour peereth172 in the meanest habit.

  What, is the jay more precious than the lark,

  Because his feathers are more beautiful?

  Or is the adder better than the eel

  Because his painted176 skin contents the eye?

  O no, good Kate, neither art thou the worse

  For this poor furniture178 and mean array.

  If thou account'st it shame, lay179 it on me.

  And therefore frolic180. We will hence forthwith,

  To feast and sport us181 at thy father's house.--

  Go, call my men, and let us straight to him,

  To Grumio

  And bring our horses unto Long-lane end.--

  There will we mount, and thither walk on foot.

  Let's see, I think 'tis now some seven o'clock,

  And well we may come there by dinnertime186.

  KATE I dare assure you, sir, 'tis almost two,

  And 'twill be suppertime188 ere you come there.

  PETRUCHIO It shall be seven ere I go to horse.

  Look, what190 I speak, or do, or think to do,

  You are still crossing191 it. Sirs, let't alone.

  I will not go today, and ere I do,

  It shall be what o'clock I say it is.

  HORTENSIO Why, so this gallant will command the sun.

  Aside

  [Exeunt]

  [Act 4 Scene 2]

  running scene 8

  Location: Padua

  Enter Tranio [disguised as Lucentio], and the Pedant dressed like Vincentio, booted and bareheaded

  TRANIO Sir, this is the house. Please it you that I call?

  PEDANT Ay, what else? And but2 I be deceived,

  Signior Baptista may remember me,

  Near twenty years ago, in Genoa,

  Where we were lodgers at the Pegasus5.

  TRANIO 'Tis well, and hold your own6, in any case,

  With such austerity as 'longeth7 to a father.

  Enter Biondello

  PEDANT I warrant you. But, sir, here comes your boy.

  'Twere good he were schooled9.

  TRANIO Fear you not him.-- Sirrah Biondello,

  Now do your duty throughly11, I advise you:

&n
bsp; Imagine 'twere the right12 Vincentio.

  BIONDELLO Tut, fear not me.

  TRANIO But hast thou done thy errand to Baptista?

  BIONDELLO I told him that your father was at Venice,

  And that you looked for16 him this day in Padua.

  TRANIO Thou'rt a tall17 fellow. Hold thee that to drink.

  Gives money

  Here comes Baptista: set your countenance18, sir.

  Enter Baptista and Lucentio

  Signior Baptista, you are happily met.

  Sir, this is the gentleman I told you of.

  To the Pedant

  I pray you stand21 good father to me now,

  Give me Bianca for my patrimony22.

  PEDANT Soft23 son!

  Sir, by your leave, having come to Padua

  To gather in some debts, my son Lucentio

  Made me acquainted with a weighty cause

  Of love between your daughter and himself:

  And, for28 the good report I hear of you,

  And for the love he beareth to your daughter,

  And she to him, to stay30 him not too long,

  I am content, in a good father's care,

  To have him matched. And if you please to like

  No worse than I32, upon some agreement

  Me shall you find ready and willing

  With one consent35 to have her so bestowed,

  For curious36 I cannot be with you,

  Signior Baptista, of whom I hear so well.

  BAPTISTA Sir, pardon me in what I have to say.

  Your plainness and your shortness please me well.

  Right true it is, your son Lucentio here

  Doth love my daughter and she loveth him,

  Or both dissemble deeply their affections.

  And therefore if you say no more than this,

  That like a father you will deal with him

  And pass45 my daughter a sufficient dower,

  The match is made and all is done.

  Your son shall have my daughter with consent.

  TRANIO I thank you, sir. Where then do you know48 best

  We be affied49 and such assurance ta'en

  As shall with either part's agreement stand?

  BAPTISTA Not in my house, Lucentio, for you know

  Pitchers have ears52, and I have many servants.

  Besides, old Gremio is heark'ning still53,

  And haply54 we might be interrupted.

  TRANIO Then at my lodging, an it like you.

  There doth my father lie56, and there, this night,

  We'll pass57 the business privately and well.

  Send for your daughter by your servant here.

  Indicates Lucentio, and winks at him

  My boy shall fetch the scriv'ner59 presently.

  The worst is this, that at so slender warning

  You are like to have a thin and slender pittance61.

  BAPTISTA It likes me well. Cambio, hie62 you home,

  And bid Bianca make her ready straight.

  And, if you will, tell what hath happened:

  Lucentio's father is arrived in Padua,

  And how she's like66 to be Lucentio's wife.

  [Exit Lucentio]

  BIONDELLO I pray the gods she may with all my heart!

  Exit

  TRANIO Dally not with the gods, but get thee gone.

  Enter Peter

  Signior Baptista, shall I lead the way?

  Welcome! One mess70 is like to be your cheer.

  Come, sir, we will better it in Pisa.

  BAPTISTA I follow you.

  Exeunt [Tranio, Pedant and Baptista]