The Two Gentlemen of Verona Read online

  To keep me from a most unholy match,

  Which heaven and fortune still33 rewards with plagues.

  I do desire thee, even from a heart

  As full of sorrows as the sea of sands,

  To bear me company and go with me:

  If not, to hide what I have said to thee,

  That I may venture to depart alone.

  EGLAMOUR Madam, I pity much your grievances,39

  Which, since I know they virtuously are placed,

  I give consent to go along with you,

  Recking as little what betideth42 me

  As much I wish all good befortune43 you.

  When will you go?

  SILVIA This evening coming.

  EGLAMOUR Where shall I meet you?

  SILVIA At Friar Patrick's cell,47

  Where I intend holy confession.

  EGLAMOUR I will not fail your ladyship.

  Good morrow, gentle lady.

  SILVIA Good morrow, kind Sir Eglamour.

  Exeunt [separately]

  Act 4 Scene 4

  running scene 16

  Enter Lance [with his dog, Crab]

  LANCE When a man's servant shall play the cur1 with him,

  look you, it goes hard: one that I brought up of2 a puppy: one

  that I saved from drowning, when three or four of his blind

  brothers and sisters went to it. I have taught him, even as

  one would say precisely, 'thus I would teach a dog'. I was sent

  to deliver him as a present to Mistress Silvia from my master,

  and I came no sooner into the dining-chamber but he steps7

  me to her trencher and steals her capon's8 leg: O, 'tis a foul

  thing when a cur cannot keep9 himself in all companies. I

  would have, as one should say, one that takes upon him10 to be

  a dog indeed, to be, as it were, a dog at11 all things. If I had not

  had more wit than he, to take a fault upon me that he did12, I

  think verily he had13 been hanged for't: sure as I live, he had

  suffered for't, you shall judge. He thrusts me14 himself into the

  company of three or four gentlemanlike dogs under the

  duke's table: he had not been there -- bless the mark16 -- a

  pissing while17, but all the chamber smelt him. 'Out with the

  dog!' says one. 'What cur is that?' says another. 'Whip him

  out', says the third. 'Hang him up', says the duke. I, having

  been acquainted with the smell before, knew it was Crab, and

  goes me to the fellow that whips the dogs: 'Friend,' quoth I,

  'you mean to whip the dog?' 'Ay, marry, do I', quoth he. 'You

  do him the more wrong,' quoth I, ''twas I did the thing you

  wot of.' He makes me no more ado24, but whips me out of the

  chamber. How many masters would do this for his servant?

  Nay, I'll be sworn, I have sat in the stocks for puddings26

  he hath stolen, otherwise he had been executed: I have stood

  on the pillory28 for geese he hath killed, otherwise he had

  suffered for't.--Thou think'st not of this now. Nay,

  To Crab

  I remember the trick you served me when I took my leave of

  Madam Silvia: did not I bid thee still mark31 me and do as I do?

  When didst thou see me heave up my leg and make water32

  against a gentlewoman's farthingale? Didst thou ever see me

  do such a trick?

  [Enter Proteus, and Julia disguised as Sebastian]

  To Julia

  PROTEUS Sebastian is thy name? I like thee well and will

  employ thee in some service presently.

  JULIA In what you please, I'll do what I can.

  To Lance

  PROTEUS I hope thou wilt.--How now, you whoreson

  peasant, where have you been these two days loitering?

  LANCE Marry, sir, I carried Mistress Silvia the dog you

  bade me.

  PROTEUS And what says she to my little jewel?42

  LANCE Marry, she says your dog was a cur43, and tells you

  currish44 thanks is good enough for such a present.

  PROTEUS But she received my dog?

  LANCE No indeed did she not: here have I brought him back

  again.

  Points to Crab

  PROTEUS What, didst thou offer her this from me?

  LANCE Ay, sir: the other squirrel49 was stolen from me by the

  hangman boys50 in the market-place, and then I offered her

  mine own, who is a dog as big as ten of yours, and therefore

  the gift the greater.

  PROTEUS Go get thee hence, and find my dog again,

  Or ne'er return again into my sight.

  Away, I say: stay'st thou to vex me here?

  [Exit Lance with Crab]

  A slave, that still an end56 turns me to shame.

  Sebastian, I have entertained57 thee,

  Partly that I have need of such a youth

  That can with some discretion do my business,

  For 'tis no trusting to yond60 foolish lout,

  But chiefly for thy face and thy behaviour,61

  Which, if my augury62 deceive me not,

  Witness63 good bringing up, fortune and truth:

  Therefore know thou, for this I entertain thee.

  Gives a ring

  Go presently, and take this ring with thee,

  Deliver it to Madam Silvia;

  She loved me well delivered67 it to me.

  JULIA It seems you loved not her, to leave68 her token:

  She is dead, belike?

  PROTEUS Not so: I think she lives.

  JULIA Alas!

  PROTEUS Why dost thou cry 'Alas'?

  JULIA I cannot choose but pity her.

  PROTEUS Wherefore shouldst thou pity her?

  JULIA Because methinks that she loved you as well

  As you do love your lady Silvia:

  She dreams on him that has forgot her love,

  You dote on her that cares not for your love.

  'Tis pity love should be so contrary:

  And thinking on it makes me cry 'Alas'.

  PROTEUS Well, give her that ring and therewithal81

  Gives a letter

  This letter. That's her chamber. Tell my lady

  I claim the promise for her heavenly picture.

  Your message done, hie home unto my chamber,

  Where thou shalt find me, sad and solitary.

  [Exit]

  JULIA How many women would do such a message?

  Alas, poor Proteus, thou hast entertained

  A fox to be the shepherd of thy lambs.

  Alas, poor fool89, why do I pity him

  That with his very heart despiseth me?

  Because he loves her, he despiseth me:

  Because I love him, I must pity him.

  This ring I gave him when he parted from me,

  To bind him to remember my good will.

  And now am I, unhappy messenger,

  To plead for that which I would not obtain,96

  To carry that which I would have refused,

  To praise his faith which I would have dispraised.

  I am my master's true-confirmed99 love,

  But cannot be true servant to my master,

  Unless I prove false traitor to myself.

  Yet will I woo for him, but yet so coldly

  As, heaven it knows, I would not have him speed.103

  [Enter Silvia, attended by her servant Ursula]

  Gentlewoman, good day: I pray you, be my mean104

  To bring me where to speak with Madam Silvia.

  SILVIA What would you with her, if that I be she?106

  JULIA If you be she, I do entreat your patience

  To hear me speak the message I am sent on.

  SILVIA From whom?

  JULIA From my master, Sir Proteus, m
adam.

  SILVIA O, he sends you for a picture?

  JULIA Ay, madam.

  SILVIA Ursula, bring my picture there.

  Ursula brings the picture

  Go give your master this: tell him from me,

  One Julia, that his changing thoughts forget,

  Would better fit his chamber116 than this shadow.

  Gives her a letter

  JULIA Madam, please you peruse this letter.

  Pardon me, madam, I have unadvised118

  Delivered you a paper that I should not:

  Takes back the letter and gives another

  This is the letter to your ladyship.

  SILVIA I pray thee, let me look on that again.

  JULIA It may not be: good madam, pardon me.

  SILVIA There, hold.123

  I will not look upon your master's lines:

  I know they are stuffed with protestations125

  And full of newfound126 oaths, which he will break

  Tears the letter

  As easily as I do tear his paper.

  Offers the ring

  JULIA Madam, he sends your ladyship this ring.

  SILVIA The more shame for him that he sends it me,

  For I have heard him say a thousand times

  His Julia gave it him at his departure.

  Though his false finger have profaned132 the ring,

  Mine shall not do his Julia so much wrong.

  JULIA She thanks you.

  SILVIA What say'st thou?

  JULIA I thank you, madam, that you tender136 her.

  Poor gentlewoman, my master wrongs her much.

  SILVIA Dost thou know her?

  JULIA Almost as well as I do know myself.

  To think upon her woes, I do protest

  That I have wept a hundred several times.

  SILVIA Belike she thinks that Proteus hath forsook her?

  JULIA I think she doth: and that's her cause of sorrow.

  SILVIA Is she not passing fair?

  JULIA She hath been fairer, madam, than she is:

  When she did think my master loved her well,

  She, in my judgement, was as fair as you.

  But since she did neglect her looking-glass

  And threw her sun-expelling mask149 away,

  The air hath starved the roses in her cheeks

  And pinched the lily-tincture151 of her face,

  That now she is become as black as I.152

  SILVIA How tall was she?

  JULIA About my stature: for at Pentecost,154

  When all our pageants of delight155 were played,

  Our youth got me to play the woman's part,

  And I was trimmed157 in Madam Julia's gown,

  Which served me as fit, by all men's judgements,

  As if the garment had been made for me:

  Therefore I know she is about my height.

  And at that time I made her weep a-good,161

  For I did play a lamentable part.

  Madam, 'twas Ariadne, passioning163

  For Theseus' perjury and unjust flight,

  Which I so lively165 acted with my tears

  That my poor mistress, moved therewithal,

  Wept bitterly: and would I might be dead

  If I in thought felt not her very sorrow.

  SILVIA She is beholding169 to thee, gentle youth.

  Alas, poor lady, desolate and left!

  I weep myself to think upon thy words.

  Here, youth, there is my purse: I give thee this

  Gives money

  For thy sweet mistress' sake, because thou lov'st her.

  Farewell.

  [Exeunt Silvia and Ursula]

  JULIA And she shall thank you for't, if e'er you know her.

  A virtuous gentlewoman, mild176 and beautiful.

  I hope my master's suit will be but cold,177

  Since she respects my mistress178' love so much.

  Alas, how love can trifle with itself!

  Here is her picture: let me see, I think

  If I had such a tire181, this face of mine

  Were full as lovely as is this of hers.

  And yet the painter flattered her a little,

  Unless I flatter with myself too much.

  Her hair is auburn, mine is perfect yellow;

  If that be all the difference in his love,

  I'll get me such a coloured periwig.187

  Her eyes are grey as glass, and so are mine:

  Ay, but her forehead's low, and mine's as high.189

  What should it be that he respects190 in her

  But I can make respective191 in myself,

  If this fond Love were not a blinded god?

  Come, shadow, come, and take this shadow up,193

  Looks at the picture

  For 'tis thy rival.--O thou senseless form,194

  Thou shalt be worshipped, kissed, loved and adored;

  And were there sense in his idolatry,

  My substance should be statue in thy stead.197

  I'll use198 thee kindly, for thy mistress' sake

  That used me so: or else, by Jove199 I vow,

  I should have scratched out your unseeing eyes

  To make my master out of love with thee.

  Exit

  Act 5 Scene 1

  running scene 17

  Enter Eglamour

  EGLAMOUR The sun begins to gild1 the western sky,

  And now it is about the very hour

  That Silvia, at Friar Patrick's cell, should meet me.

  She will not fail; for lovers break not hours,4

  Unless it be to come before their time,5

  So much they spur their expedition.6

  See where she comes.--

  [Enter Silvia, with a mask]

  Lady, a happy evening!

  SILVIA Amen, amen.8 Go on, good Eglamour,

  Out at the postern9 by the abbey-wall;

  I fear I am attended10 by some spies.

  EGLAMOUR Fear not. The forest is not three leagues11 off:

  If we recover that, we are sure12 enough.

  Exeunt

  Act 5 Scene 2

  running scene 18

  Enter Turio, Proteus, [and] Julia [disguised as Sebastian]

  TURIO Sir Proteus, what says Silvia to my suit?

  PROTEUS O, sir, I find her milder2 than she was,

  And yet she takes exceptions at your person.3

  TURIO What? That my leg is too long?

  PROTEUS No, that it is too little.5

  TURIO I'll wear a boot, to make it somewhat rounder.

  Aside

  JULIA But love will not be spurred7 to what it loathes.

  TURIO What says she to my face?

  PROTEUS She says it is a fair9 one.

  TURIO Nay then, the wanton lies: my face is black.10

  PROTEUS But pearls are fair; and the old saying is,

  Black men are pearls in beauteous ladies' eyes.

  Aside

  JULIA 'Tis true, such pearls as put out ladies' eyes,13

  For I had rather wink than look on them.

  TURIO How likes she my discourse?

  PROTEUS Ill, when you talk of war.16

  TURIO But well, when I discourse of love and peace.

  Aside

  JULIA But better indeed, when you hold your peace.18

  TURIO What says she to my valour?

  PROTEUS O, sir, she makes20 no doubt of that.

  Aside

  JULIA She needs not, when she knows it cowardice.

  TURIO What says she to my birth?22

  PROTEUS That you are well derived.23

  Aside

  JULIA True: from a gentleman to a fool.

  TURIO Considers she my possessions?

  PROTEUS O ay, and pities26 them.

  TURIO Wherefore?

  Aside

  JULIA That such an ass should owe28 them.

  PROTEUS That they are out by lease.29

  JULIA Here comes the
duke.

  [Enter the Duke]

  DUKE How now, Sir Proteus; how now, Turio.

  Which of you saw Eglamour of late?

  TURIO Not I.

  PROTEUS Nor I.

  DUKE Saw you my daughter?

  PROTEUS Neither.

  DUKE Why then,

  She's fled unto that peasant Valentine,

  And Eglamour is in her company.

  'Tis true, for Friar Laurence40 met them both

  As he, in penance, wandered through the forest.

  Him42 he knew well, and guessed that it was she,

  But, being masked43, he was not sure of it.

  Besides, she did intend confession

  At Patrick's cell this even45, and there she was not.

  These likelihoods confirm her flight from hence.

  Therefore I pray you stand47 not to discourse,

  But mount you48 presently and meet with me

  Upon the rising of the mountain-foot

  That leads toward Mantua, whither they are fled:

  Dispatch51, sweet gentlemen, and follow me.

  [Exit]

  TURIO Why, this it is to be a peevish girl,

  That flies her fortune53 when it follows her.

  I'll after, more to be revenged on Eglamour

  Than for the love of reckless55 Silvia.

  [Exit]

  PROTEUS And I will follow, more for Silvia's love

  Than hate of Eglamour that goes with her.

  [Exit]

  JULIA And I will follow, more to cross that love

  Than hate for Silvia, that is gone for love.

  Exit

  Act 5 Scene 3

  running scene 19

  [Enter] Silvia [with the] Outlaws

  FIRST OUTLAW Come, come, be patient:

  We must bring you to our captain.

  SILVIA A thousand more mischances3 than this one

  Have learned me how to brook4 this patiently.

  SECOND OUTLAW Come, bring her away.

  FIRST OUTLAW Where is the gentleman that was with her?

  THIRD OUTLAW Being nimble-footed, he hath outrun us.

  But Moyses and Valerius8 follow him.

  Go thou with her to the west end of the wood,

  There is our captain: we'll follow him that's fled.

  The thicket is beset11, he cannot scape.

  [Exeunt Second and Third Outlaws]

  FIRST OUTLAW Come, I must bring you to our captain's cave.

  Fear not: he bears an honourable mind,

  And will not use a woman lawlessly.

  SILVIA O Valentine, this I endure for thee!

  Exeunt

  Act 5 Scene 4

  running scene 19 continues

  Enter Valentine

  VALENTINE How use1 doth breed a habit in a man!

  This shadowy desert2, unfrequented woods,

  I better brook than flourishing peopled towns:

  Here can I sit alone, unseen of any,

  And to the nightingale's complaining5 notes

  Tune my distresses and record6 my woes.

  O thou that dost inhabit in my breast,