All's Well That Ends Well Read online

  Fall, when love please! Marry, to each, but one!

  LAFEW I'd give bay curtal and his furniture57

  My mouth no more were broken than these boys'58,

  And writ59 as little beard.

  KING Peruse them well:

  Not one of those but had a noble father.

  HELEN Gentlemen, heaven hath through me restored the

  king to health.

  She addresses her to a Lord

  ALL We understand it, and thank heaven for you.

  HELEN I am a simple maid, and therein wealthiest

  That I protest66 I simply am a maid.

  Please it your majesty, I have done already.

  The blushes in my cheeks thus whisper68 me,

  'We blush that thou shouldst choose. But be refused,

  Let the white death70 sit on thy cheek for ever,

  We'll ne'er come there again.'

  KING Make choice and see,

  Who shuns thy love shuns all his love in me.73

  HELEN Now, Dian74, from thy altar do I fly,

  And to imperial Love75, that god most high,

  To First Lord

  Do my sighs stream.-- Sir, will you hear my suit?

  FIRST LORD And grant it.

  HELEN Thanks, sir. All78 the rest is mute.

  Aside

  LAFEW I had rather be in this choice than throw

  ames-ace for my life.80

  To Second Lord

  HELEN The honour81, sir, that flames in your fair eyes

  Before I speak, too threat'ningly replies.

  Love83 make your fortunes twenty times above

  Her that so wishes84, and her humble love.

  SECOND LORD No better85, if you please.

  HELEN My wish receive,

  Which great love grant! And so I take my leave.

  Aside

  LAFEW Do all they deny her? An they were sons

  of mine, I'd have them whipped, or I would send them to

  th'Turk90 to make eunuchs of.

  To Third Lord

  HELEN Be not afraid that I your hand should take.

  I'll never do you wrong for your own sake.

  Blessing upon your vows, and in your bed

  Find fairer fortune, if you ever wed!

  Aside

  LAFEW These boys are boys of ice, they'll none have

  her. Sure96 they are bastards to the English, the French ne'er

  got97 'em.

  To Fourth Lord

  HELEN You are too young, too happy98, and too good,

  To make yourself a son out of my blood.

  FOURTH LORD Fair one, I think not so.

  Aside

  LAFEW There's one grape101 yet. I am sure thy father

  drunk wine.102 But if thou be'st not an ass, I am a youth of

  fourteen. I have known103 thee already.

  To Bertram

  HELEN I dare not say I take you, but I give

  Me and my service, ever whilst I live,

  Into your guiding power. This is the man.

  KING Why, then, young Bertram, take her: she's thy wife.

  BERTRAM My wife, my liege? I shall beseech your highness,

  In such a business give me leave to use

  The help of mine own eyes.

  KING Know'st thou not, Bertram, what she has done for me?

  BERTRAM Yes, my good lord,

  But never hope to know why I should marry her.

  KING Thou know'st she has raised me from my sickly bed.

  BERTRAM But follows it, my lord, to bring me down115

  Must answer for your raising? I know her well:

  She had her breeding at my father's charge.117

  A poor physician's daughter my wife? Disdain

  Rather corrupt me ever!119

  KING 'Tis only title120 thou disdain'st in her, the which

  I can build up. Strange is it that our bloods,

  Of colour, weight and heat, poured all together,

  Would quite confound distinction, yet stands off123

  In differences so mighty. If she be

  All that is virtuous, save what thou dislik'st,

  A poor physician's daughter, thou dislik'st

  Of virtue for the name. But do not so.

  From lowest place whence virtuous things proceed128,

  The place is dignified by th'doer's deed.

  Where great additions swell's, and virtue none130,

  It is a dropsied131 honour. Good alone

  Is good without a name. Vileness is so:

  The property by what it is should go133,

  Not by the title. She is young, wise, fair.

  In these to nature she's immediate heir135,

  And these breed honour. That is honour's scorn136,

  Which challenges itself as honour's born

  And is not like the sire. Honours thrive,

  When rather from our acts we them derive

  Than our foregoers.140 The mere word's a slave,

  Deboshed141 on every tomb, on every grave

  A lying trophy142, and as oft is dumb,

  Where dust and damned oblivion is the tomb

  Of honoured bones indeed.144 What should be said?

  If thou canst like this creature as a maid,

  I can create the rest: virtue and she

  Is her own dower147, honour and wealth from me.

  BERTRAM I cannot love her, nor will strive148 to do't.

  KING Thou wrong'st thyself if thou shouldst strive to choose.149

  HELEN That you are well restored150, my lord, I'm glad.

  Let the rest go.

  KING My honour's at the stake, which152 to defeat,

  I must produce my power. Here, take her hand,

  Proud scornful boy, unworthy this154 good gift,

  That dost in vile misprision155 shackle up

  My love and her desert. That156 canst not dream,

  We, poising us in her defective157 scale,

  Shall weigh thee to the beam.158 That wilt not know,

  It is in us159 to plant thine honour where

  We please to have it grow. Check160 thy contempt:

  Obey our will, which travails in161 thy good.

  Believe not thy disdain, but presently162

  Do thine own fortunes that obedient right

  Which both thy duty owes and our power claims,

  Or I will throw thee from my care forever

  Into the staggers and the careless lapse166

  Of youth and ignorance, both my revenge and hate

  Loosing168 upon thee, in the name of justice,

  Without all terms169 of pity. Speak. Thine answer.

  BERTRAM Pardon, my gracious lord, for I submit

  My fancy171 to your eyes. When I consider

  What great creation and what dole172 of honour

  Flies where you bid it, I find that she, which late173

  Was in my nobler thoughts most base, is now

  The praised of the king, who175, so ennobled,

  Is as 'twere born so.

  KING Take her by the hand,

  And tell her she is thine, to whom I promise

  A counterpoise, if not179 to thy estate,

  A balance more replete.180

  BERTRAM I take her hand.

  KING Good fortune and the favour of the king

  Smile upon this contract, whose ceremony183

  Shall seem expedient on the now-born brief,

  And be performed tonight. The solemn feast

  Shall more attend upon the coming space186,

  Expecting absent friends. As187 thou lov'st her,

  Thy love's to me religious, else, does err.188

  Exeunt. Parolles and Lafew stay behind commenting of this wedding

  LAFEW Do you hear, monsieur? A word with you.

  PAROLLES Your pleasure, sir.

  LAFEW Your lord and master did well to make his

  recantation.

  PAROLLES Recantation? My lord? My master?r />
  LAFEW Ay. Is it not a language I speak?

  PAROLLES A most harsh one, and not to be understood

  without bloody succeeding.196 My master?

  LAFEW Are you companion197 to the Count Rossillion?

  PAROLLES To any count, to all counts, to what is man.198

  LAFEW To what is count's man. Count's master is of

  another style.

  PAROLLES You are too old, sir. Let it satisfy201 you, you are too old.

  LAFEW I must tell thee, sirrah, I write202 man, to which title

  age cannot bring thee.

  PAROLLES What I dare too well do, I dare not do.204

  LAFEW I did think thee, for two ordinaries205, to be a pretty

  wise fellow. Thou didst make tolerable vent206 of thy travel, it

  might pass. Yet the scarfs and the bannerets207 about thee did

  manifoldly dissuade me from believing thee a vessel208 of too

  great a burden. I have now found thee.209 When I lose thee

  again, I care not. Yet art thou good for nothing but taking up210,

  and that thou'rt scarce worth.

  PAROLLES Hadst thou not the privilege of antiquity212 upon

  thee--

  LAFEW Do not plunge thyself too far in anger, lest thou

  hasten thy trial, which if-- lord have mercy on thee for a hen!215

  So, my good window of lattice, fare thee well. Thy casement216 I

  need not open, for I look through thee. Give me thy hand.

  PAROLLES My lord, you give me most egregious218 indignity.

  LAFEW Ay, with all my heart, and thou art worthy of it.

  PAROLLES I have not, my lord, deserved it.

  LAFEW Yes, good faith, every dram of it, and I will not bate221

  thee a scruple.222

  PAROLLES Well, I shall be wiser.223

  LAFEW Even as soon as thou canst, for thou hast to pull at a224

  smack o'th'contrary. If ever thou be'st bound in thy scarf

  and beaten, thou shall find what it is to be proud of thy

  bondage. I have a desire to hold227 my acquaintance with thee,

  or rather my knowledge, that I may say in the default228, he is a

  man I know.229

  PAROLLES My lord, you do me most insupportable vexation.

  LAFEW I would it were hell-pains for thy sake, and my poor231

  doing eternal. For doing I am past, as I will by thee, in what232

  motion age will give me leave.

  Exit

  PAROLLES Well, thou hast a son shall take this disgrace off me234;

  scurvy235, old, filthy, scurvy lord! Well, I must be patient. There

  is no fettering236 of authority. I'll beat him, by my life, if I can

  meet him with any convenience, an237 he were double and

  double a lord. I'll have no more pity of his age than I would

  have of-- I'll beat him, an if I could but meet him again.

  Enter Lafew

  LAFEW Sirrah, your lord and master's married. There's

  news for you: you have a new mistress.

  PAROLLES I most unfeignedly beseech your lordship to make

  some reservation of your wrongs. He is my good lord. Whom243

  I serve above is my master.

  LAFEW Who? God?

  PAROLLES Ay, sir.

  LAFEW The devil it is that's thy master. Why dost thou

  garter up thy arms o' this fashion? Dost make hose248 of thy

  sleeves? Do other servants so? Thou wert best set thy lower249

  part where thy nose stands. By mine honour, if I were but

  two hours younger, I'd beat thee. Methink'st thou art a

  general offence, and every man should beat thee. I think

  thou wast created for men to breathe253 themselves upon thee.

  PAROLLES This is hard and undeserved measure254, my lord.

  LAFEW Go to, sir. You were beaten in Italy for picking a255

  kernel out of a pomegranate. You are a vagabond256 and no

  true traveller. You are more saucy257 with lords and honourable

  personages than the commission258 of your birth and virtue

  gives you heraldry.259 You are not worth another word, else I'd

  call you knave. I leave you.

  Exit

  PAROLLES Good, very good, it is so then. Good, very good, let it

  be concealed awhile.

  Enter Count Rossillion [Bertram]

  BERTRAM Undone, and forfeited to cares263 forever!

  PAROLLES What's the matter, sweet heart?

  BERTRAM Although before the solemn priest I have sworn,

  I will not bed her.

  PAROLLES What, what, sweetheart?

  BERTRAM O my Parolles, they have married me!

  I'll to the Tuscan wars and never bed her.

  PAROLLES France is a dog-hole, and it no more merits

  The tread of a man's foot: to th'wars!

  BERTRAM There's letters from my mother. What th'import272 is,

  I know not yet.

  PAROLLES Ay, that would be known. To th'wars, my boy, to th'wars!

  He wears his honour in a box275 unseen

  That hugs his kicky-wicky276 here at home,

  Spending his manly marrow277 in her arms,

  Which should sustain the bound and high curvet278

  Of Mars' fiery steed. To other regions,

  France is a stable, we that dwell in't jades280:

  Therefore, to th'war!

  BERTRAM It shall be so. I'll send her to my house,

  Acquaint my mother with my hate to her,

  And wherefore I am fled, write to the king

  That which I durst not speak. His present gift

  Shall furnish me to those Italian fields286

  Where noble fellows strike. War is no strife

  To the dark house288 and the detested wife.

  PAROLLES Will this capriccio hold in thee? Art289 sure?

  BERTRAM Go with me to my chamber, and advise me.

  I'll send her straight291 away. Tomorrow

  I'll to the wars, she to her single sorrow.

  PAROLLES Why, these balls bound293, there's noise in it. 'Tis hard.

  A young man married is a man that's marred294:

  Therefore away, and leave her bravely, go.

  The king has done you wrong, but hush, 'tis so.

  Exeunt

  [Act 2 Scene 4]

  running scene 6 continues

  Enter Helena and Clown [Lavatch]

  Helen reading a letter

  HELEN My mother greets me kindly.1 Is she well?

  LAVATCH She is not well2, but yet she has her health: she's very

  merry, but yet she is not well: but thanks be given, she's very

  well and wants4 nothing i'th'world; but yet she is not well.

  HELEN If she be very well, what does she ail, that she's not very well?

  LAVATCH Truly, she's very well indeed, but for two things.

  HELEN What two things?

  LAVATCH One, that she's not in heaven, whither God send her

  quickly. The other, that she's in earth, from whence God send

  her quickly.

  Enter Parolles

  PAROLLES Bless you, my fortunate lady.

  HELEN I hope, sir, I have your good will to have mine own

  good fortune.

  PAROLLES You had my prayers to lead them14 on, and to keep

  them15 on, have them still. O, my knave, how does my old lady?

  LAVATCH So16 that you had her wrinkles and I her money, I

  would she did17 as you say.

  PAROLLES Why, I say nothing.

  LAVATCH Marry, you are the wiser man, for many a man's19

  tongue shakes out20 his master's undoing: to say nothing, to

  do nothing, to know nothing, and to have nothing, is to be a

  great part of your title22, which is within a very little of

  nothin
g.

  PAROLLES Away! Thou'rt a knave.

  LAVATCH You should have said, sir, 'Before25 a knave thou'rt a

  knave.' That's, 'Before me26 thou'rt a knave.' This had been

  truth, sir.

  PAROLLES Go to, thou art a witty fool. I have found thee.28

  LAVATCH Did you find me29 in yourself, sir? Or were you taught

  to find me? The search, sir, was profitable. And much fool

  may you find in you, even to31 the world's pleasure and the

  increase of laughter.

  PAROLLES A good knave, i'faith, and well fed.33--

  Madam, my lord will go away tonight.

  A very serious business calls on him.

  The great prerogative and rite of love36,

  Which, as your due, time claims, he does acknowledge,

  But puts it off to38 a compelled restraint,

  Whose want, and whose delay, is strewed with sweets39,

  Which they distil now in the curbed40 time,

  To make the coming hour o'erflow with joy

  And pleasure drown42 the brim.

  HELEN What's his will else?43

  PAROLLES That you will take your instant leave o'th'king

  And make this haste as your own good proceeding45,

  Strength'ned with what apology46 you think

  May make it probable need.47

  HELEN What more commands he?

  PAROLLES That, having this obtained, you presently

  Attend his further pleasure.50

  HELEN In everything I wait upon his will.

  PAROLLES I shall report it so.

  Exit

  To Parolles/To Lavatch

  HELEN I pray you.-- Come, sirrah.

  Exeunt

  [Act 2 Scene 5]

  running scene 6 continues

  Enter Lafew and Bertram

  LAFEW But I hope your lordship thinks not him a soldier.

  BERTRAM Yes, my lord, and of very valiant approof.

  LAFEW You have it from his own deliverance.3

  BERTRAM And by other warranted testimony.

  LAFEW Then my dial goes not true. I took this lark for a5

  bunting.

  BERTRAM I do assure you, my lord, he is very great in

  knowledge and accordingly8 valiant.

  LAFEW I have then sinned against his experience and

  transgressed against his valour, and my state10 that way is

  dangerous, since I cannot yet find11 in my heart to repent.

  Here he comes. I pray you make us friends. I will pursue the

  amity.

  Enter Parolles

  To Bertram

  PAROLLES These things shall be done, sir.

  To Bertram

  LAFEW Pray you, sir, who's his tailor?15

  PAROLLES Sir?

  LAFEW O, I know him well. Ay, 'sir', he. 'Sir' 's a good

  workman, a very good tailor.

  Aside to Parolles

  BERTRAM Is she gone to the king?

  PAROLLES She is.

  BERTRAM Will she away tonight?

  PAROLLES As you'll have22 her.

  BERTRAM I have writ my letters, casketed my treasure,

  Given order for our horses, and tonight,

  When I should take possession of the bride,