A Midsummer Night's Dream Read online

  Exeunt

  [Act 3 Scene 2]

  running scene 5

  Enter King of Fairies [Oberon] alone

  OBERON I wonder if Titania be awaked;

  Then what it was that next came in her eye,

  Which she must dote on in extremity3.

  Enter [Robin] Puck

  Here comes my messenger.-- How now, mad spirit?

  What night-rule now about this haunted5 grove?

  ROBIN My mistress with a monster is in love.

  Near to her close7 and consecrated bower, While she was in her dull8 and sleeping hour, A crew of patches, rude mechanicals9, That work for bread upon Athenian stalls,

  Were met together to rehearse a play

  Intended for great Theseus' nuptial-day.

  The shallowest thick-skin of that barren sort13, Who Pyramus presented in their sport,

  Forsook his scene15 and entered in a brake, When I did him at this advantage take:

  An ass's noll17 I fixed on his head.

  Anon his Thisbe must be answered,

  And forth my mimic19 comes. When they him spy, As wild geese that the creeping fowler20 eye, Or russet-pated choughs, many in sort21, Rising and cawing at the gun's report22, Sever themselves and madly sweep23 the sky, So, at his sight, away his fellows fly.

  And at our stamp here o'er and o'er one falls;

  He 'murder' cries and help from Athens calls.

  Their sense thus weak, lost with their fears thus strong,

  Made senseless things begin to do them wrong.

  For briars and thorns at their apparel snatch,

  Some sleeves, some hats, from yielders30 all things catch.

  I led them on in this distracted fear,

  And left sweet Pyramus translated there:

  When in that moment, so it came to pass,

  Titania waked and straightway loved an ass.

  OBERON This falls out better than I could devise.

  But hast thou yet latched36 the Athenian's eyes With the love juice, as I did bid thee do?

  ROBIN I took him sleeping -- that is finished too --

  And the Athenian woman by his side,

  That, when he waked, of force40 she must be eyed.

  Enter Demetrius and Hermia

  OBERON Stand close41. This is the same Athenian.

  They stand aside

  ROBIN This is the woman, but not this the man.

  DEMETRIUS O, why rebuke you him that loves you so?

  Lay breath so bitter on your bitter foe.

  HERMIA Now I but chide, but I should use45 thee worse, For thou, I fear, hast given me cause to curse,

  If thou hast slain Lysander in his sleep,

  Being o'er shoes48 in blood, plunge in the deep, And kill me too.

  The sun was not so true50 unto the day As he to me. Would he have stol'n away

  From sleeping Hermia? I'll believe as soon

  This whole earth may be bored53 and that the moon May through the centre54 creep, and so displease Her brother's noontide with th'Antipodes55.

  It cannot be but thou hast murdered him,

  So should a murderer look, so dead57, so grim.

  DEMETRIUS So should the murdered look, and so should I, Pierced through the heart with your stern cruelty:

  Yet you, the murderer, looks as bright, as clear,

  As yonder Venus in her glimm'ring sphere61.

  HERMIA What's this to62 my Lysander? Where is he?

  Ah, good Demetrius, wilt thou give him me?

  DEMETRIUS I'd rather give his carcass to my hounds.

  HERMIA Out, dog! Out, cur65! Thou driv'st me past the bounds Of maiden's patience. Hast thou slain him, then?

  Henceforth be never numbered67 among men.

  O, once68 tell true, tell true even for my sake!

  Durst thou a69 looked upon him being awake?

  And hast thou killed him sleeping? O brave touch70!

  Could not a worm71, an adder, do so much?

  An adder did it, for with doubler72 tongue Than thine, thou serpent, never adder stung.

  DEMETRIUS You spend your passion on a misprised mood74.

  I am not guilty of Lysander's blood,

  Nor is he dead, for aught that I can tell.

  HERMIA I pray thee tell me then that he is well.

  DEMETRIUS An if I could, what should I get therefor78?

  HERMIA A privilege never to see me more;

  And from thy hated presence part I so:

  See me no more, whether he be dead or no.

  Exit

  DEMETRIUS There is no following her in this fierce vein82: Here therefore for a while I will remain.

  So sorrow's heaviness doth heavier84 grow For85 debt that bankrupt sleep doth sorrow owe, Which now in some slight measure it will pay,

  If for his tender here I make some stay87.

  [Demetrius] lies down [and sleeps]

  OBERON What hast thou done? Thou hast mistaken quite88

  And laid the love juice on some true love's sight:

  Of thy misprision90 must perforce ensue Some true love turned, and not a false turned true.

  ROBIN Then fate o'errules, that, one man holding troth92, A million fail, confounding oath on93 oath.

  OBERON About the wood go swifter than the wind,

  And Helena of Athens look95 thou find.

  All fancy-sick she is and pale of cheer96, With sighs of love, that costs the fresh blood dear97.

  By some illusion98 see thou bring her here.

  I'll charm his eyes against99 she doth appear.

  ROBIN I go, I go, look how I go,

  Swifter than arrow from the Tartar's bow101.

  Exit

  OBERON Flower of this purple dye,

  Squeezes juice on Demetrius' eyes

  Hit with Cupid's archery,

  Sink in apple104 of his eye.

  When his love he doth espy,

  Let her shine as glor'ously

  As the Venus of the sky.

  When thou wak'st, if she be by,

  Beg of her for remedy109.

  Enter [Robin] Puck

  ROBIN Captain of our fairy band,

  Helena is here at hand,

  And the youth, mistook by me,

  Pleading for a lover's fee113.

  Shall we their fond pageant114 see?

  Lord, what fools these mortals be!

  OBERON Stand aside: the noise they make

  Will cause Demetrius to awake.

  They stand aside

  ROBIN Then will two at once woo one,

  That must needs be sport alone119.

  And those things do best please me

  That befall preposterously121.

  Enter Lysander [following] Helena

  LYSANDER Why should you think that I should woo in scorn?

  Scorn and derision never come in tears:

  Look when124 I vow, I weep; and vows so born, In their nativity125 all truth appears.

  How can these things in me seem scorn to you,

  Bearing the badge127 of faith to prove them true?

  HELENA You do advance128 your cunning more and more.

  When truth kills truth, O devilish-holy fray129!

  These vows are Hermia's. Will you give her o'er130?

  Weigh oath with oath, and you will nothing weigh.

  Your vows to her and me, put in two scales,

  Will even weigh, and both as light as tales133.

  LYSANDER I had no judgement when to her I swore.

  HELENA Nor none, in my mind, now you give her o'er.

  LYSANDER Demetrius loves her, and he you136.

  DEMETRIUS O Helen, goddess, nymph, perfect, divine!

  Awakes

  To what, my love, shall I compare thine eyne?

  Crystal is muddy. O, how ripe in show139

  Thy lips, those kissing cherries, tempting grow!

  That pure congealed white, high Taurus'141 snow, Fanned with the eastern wind, turns to a crow142

  When th
ou hold'st up thy hand. O, let me kiss

  This princess of pure white, this seal144 of bliss!

  HELENA O spite! O hell! I see you all are bent145

  To set against146 me for your merriment: If you were civil and knew courtesy,

  You would not do me thus much injury148.

  Can you not hate me, as I know you do,

  But you must join in souls150 to mock me too?

  If you were men, as men you are in show,

  You would not use a gentle152 lady so; To vow, and swear, and superpraise my parts153, When I am sure you hate me with your hearts.

  You both are rivals and love Hermia;

  And now both rivals to mock Helena.

  A trim157 exploit, a manly enterprise, To conjure tears up in a poor maid's eyes

  With your derision; none of noble sort

  Would so offend a virgin and extort160

  A poor soul's patience, all to make you sport.

  LYSANDER You are unkind, Demetrius; be not so,

  For you love Hermia; this you know I know;

  And here, with all good will, with all my heart,

  In Hermia's love I yield you up my part;

  And yours of Helena to me bequeath,

  Whom I do love and will do till my death.

  HELENA Never did mockers waste more idle breath.

  DEMETRIUS Lysander, keep thy Hermia, I will none169: If e'er I loved her, all that love is gone.

  My heart to her but as guestwise sojourned171, And now to Helen is it home returned,

  There to remain.

  LYSANDER Helen, it is not so.

  DEMETRIUS Disparage not the faith thou dost not know, Lest to thy peril thou abide it dear176.

  Look where thy love comes, yonder is thy dear.

  Enter Hermia

  HERMIA Dark night, that from the eye his178 function takes, The ear more quick of apprehension179 makes, Wherein it doth impair the seeing sense,

  It pays the hearing double recompense.

  Thou art not by mine eye, Lysander, found,

  Mine ear, I thank it, brought me to thy sound.

  But why unkindly didst thou leave me so?

  LYSANDER Why should he stay whom love doth press to go?

  HERMIA What love could press186 Lysander from my side?

  LYSANDER Lysander's love, that would not let him bide187 --

  Fair Helena, who more engilds188 the night Than all yon fiery oes189 and eyes of light.--

  Why seek'st thou me? Could not this make thee know,

  To Hermia

  The hate I bear thee made me leave thee so?

  HERMIA You speak not as you think; it cannot be.

  HELENA Lo, she is one of this confed'racy193!

  Now I perceive they have conjoined all three

  To fashion this false sport in spite195 of me.

  Injurious196 Hermia, most ungrateful maid, Have you conspired, have you with these contrived

  To bait198 me with this foul derision?

  Is all the counsel199 that we two have shared, The sisters' vows, the hours that we have spent,

  When we have chid201 the hasty-footed time For parting us -- O, is all forgot?

  All schooldays' friendship, childhood innocence?

  We, Hermia, like two artificial204 gods, Have with our needles created both one flower,

  Both on one sampler, sitting on one cushion,

  Both warbling of one song, both in one key207, As if our hands, our sides, voices and minds,

  Had been incorporate209. So we grew together Like210 to a double cherry, seeming parted, But yet a union in partition,

  Two lovely berries moulded on one stem,

  So with two seeming bodies but one heart213, Two of the first, like coats214 in heraldry, Due but to one and crowned with one215 crest.

  And will you rent our ancient love asunder216, To join with men in scorning your poor friend?

  It is not friendly, 'tis not maidenly.

  Our sex, as well as I, may chide you for it,

  Though I alone do feel the injury.

  HERMIA I am amazed at your passionate words.

  I scorn you not; it seems that you scorn me.

  HELENA Have you not set Lysander, as in scorn,

  To follow me and praise my eyes and face?

  And made your other love, Demetrius,

  Who even but now did spurn me with his foot,

  To call me goddess, nymph, divine and rare227, Precious, celestial? Wherefore speaks he this

  To her he hates? And wherefore doth Lysander

  Deny your love, so rich within his soul,

  And tender231 me, forsooth, affection, But by your setting on, by your consent?

  What though I be not so in grace233 as you, So hung upon with love, so fortunate,

  But miserable most, to love unloved?

  This you should pity rather than despise.

  HERMIA I understand not what you mean by this.

  HELENA Ay, do. Persever, counterfeit sad238 looks, Make mouths239 upon me when I turn my back, Wink each at other, hold the sweet jest up240: This sport well carried241 shall be chronicled.

  If you have any pity, grace, or manners,

  You would not make me such an argument243.

  But fare ye well. 'Tis partly my own fault,

  Which death or absence soon shall remedy.

  LYSANDER Stay, gentle Helena, hear my excuse:

  My love, my life, my soul, fair Helena!

  HELENA O excellent!

  HERMIA Sweet, do not scorn her so.

  To Lysander

  DEMETRIUS If she cannot entreat, I can compel.

  To Lysander

  LYSANDER Thou canst compel no more than she entreat.

  Thy threats have no more strength than her weak prayers.

  Helen, I love thee, by my life, I do;

  I swear by that which I will lose for thee,

  To prove him false that says I love thee not.

  DEMETRIUS I say I love thee more than he can do.

  To Helena

  LYSANDER If thou say so, withdraw257, and prove it too.

  DEMETRIUS Quick, come!

  HERMIA Lysander, whereto259 tends all this?

  She hangs on Lysander

  LYSANDER Away, you Ethiope260!

  DEMETRIUS No, no, sir,

  Seem to break loose; take on as262 you would follow, But yet come not: you are a tame man, go!

  LYSANDER Hang off, thou cat, thou burr! Vile thing, let loose264, Or I will shake thee from me like a serpent!

  HERMIA Why are you grown so rude266?

  What change is this, sweet love?

  LYSANDER Thy love? Out, tawny Tartar268, out!

  Out, loathed medicine269! O hated potion, hence!

  HERMIA Do you not jest?

  HELENA Yes, sooth271, and so do you.

  LYSANDER Demetrius, I will keep my word with thee.

  DEMETRIUS I would I had your bond, for I perceive A weak bond274 holds you; I'll not trust your word.

  LYSANDER What, should I hurt her, strike her, kill her dead?

  Although I hate her, I'll not harm her so.

  HERMIA What, can you do me greater harm than hate?

  Hate me? Wherefore? O me! What news, my love?

  Am not I Hermia? Are not you Lysander?

  I am as fair now as I was erewhile280.

  Since night you loved me; yet since night you left me.

  Why, then you left me -- O, the gods forbid! --

  In earnest, shall I say?

  LYSANDER Ay, by my life;

  And never did desire to see thee more.

  Therefore be out of286 hope, of question, of doubt; Be certain, nothing truer: 'tis no jest

  That I do hate thee and love Helena.

  HERMIA O me! You juggler, you canker-blossom289,

  To Helena

  You thief of love! What, have you come by night

  And stolen my love's heart from him?

  HELENA Fine, i'faith!


  Have you no modesty, no maiden shame,

  No touch of bashfulness? What, will you tear

  Impatient295 answers from my gentle tongue?

  Fie, fie! You counterfeit, you puppet296, you!

  HERMIA Puppet? Why so? Ay, that way goes the game.

  Now I perceive that she hath made compare

  Between our statures, she hath urged299 her height, And with her personage300, her tall personage, Her height, forsooth, she hath prevailed with him.

  And are you grown so high in his esteem

  Because I am so dwarfish and so low?

  How low am I, thou painted maypole304? Speak!

  How low am I? I am not yet so low

  But that my nails can reach unto thine eyes.

  Attacks her

  HELENA I pray you, though you mock me, gentlemen, Let her not hurt me; I was never curst308, I have no gift at all in shrewishness309; I am a right310 maid for my cowardice; Let her not strike me. You perhaps may think,

  Because she is something lower312 than myself, That I can match her.

  HERMIA Lower? Hark, again.

  HELENA Good Hermia, do not be so bitter with me.

  I evermore316 did love you, Hermia, Did ever keep your counsels, never wronged you,

  Save that, in love unto Demetrius,

  I told him of your stealth319 unto this wood.

  He followed you. For love I followed him.

  But he hath chid me hence321 and threatened me To strike me, spurn me, nay, to kill me too;

  And now, so323 you will let me quiet go, To Athens will I bear my folly back

  And follow you no further. Let me go.

  You see how simple and how fond326 I am.

  HERMIA Why, get you gone: who is't that hinders you?

  HELENA A foolish heart, that I leave here behind.

  HERMIA What, with Lysander?

  HELENA With Demetrius.

  LYSANDER Be not afraid: she shall not harm thee, Helena.

  DEMETRIUS No, sir, she shall not, though you take her part332.

  HELENA O, when she's angry, she is keen and shrewd333.

  She was a vixen when she went to school,

  And though she be but little, she is fierce.

  HERMIA 'Little' again! Nothing but 'low' and 'little'?

  Why will you suffer337 her to flout me thus?

  Let me come to her.

  LYSANDER Get you gone, you dwarf,

  You minimus, of hind'ring knot-grass340 made!

  You bead, you acorn.

  DEMETRIUS You are too officious

  In her behalf that scorns your services.

  Let her alone. Speak not of Helena,

  Take not her part. For if thou dost intend

  Never so little show of love to her,

  Thou shalt abide347 it.

  LYSANDER Now she holds me not.

  Now follow, if thou dar'st, to try whose right,

  Of thine or mine, is most in Helena.

  DEMETRIUS Follow? Nay, I'll go with thee, cheek by jowl351.