The Oxford Shakespeare: The Complete Works Page 20

  It shall become to serve all hopes conceived

  To deck his fortune with his virtuous deeds.

  And therefore, Tranio, for the time I study,

  Virtue and that part of philosophy

  Will I apply that treats of happiness

  By virtue specially to be achieved.

  Tell me thy mind, for I have Pisa left

  And am to Padua come as he that leaves

  A shallow plash to plunge him in the deep,

  And with satiety seeks to quench his thirst.

  TRANIO

  Mi perdonate, gentle master mine.

  I am in all affected as yourself,

  Glad that you thus continue your resolve

  To suck the sweets of sweet philosophy.

  Only, good master, while we do admire

  This virtue and this moral discipline,

  Let’s be no stoics nor no stocks, I pray,

  Or so devote to Aristotle’s checks

  As Ovid be an outcast quite abjured.

  Balk logic with acquaintance that you have,

  And practise rhetoric in your common talk.

  Music and poesy use to quicken you;

  The mathematics and the metaphysics,

  Fall to them as you find your stomach serves you.

  No profit grows where is no pleasure ta’en.

  In brief, sir, study what you most affect.

  LUCENTIO

  Gramercies, Tranio, well dost thou advise.

  If, Biondello, thou wert come ashore,

  We could at once put us in readiness

  And take a lodging fit to entertain

  Such friends as time in Padua shall beget.

  But stay a while, what company is this?

  TRANIO

  Master, some show to welcome us to town.

  Enter Baptista with his two daughters, Katherine and Bianca; Gremio, a pantaloon; Hortensio, suitor to Bianca. Lucentio and Tranio stand by

  BAPTISTA

  Gentlemen, importune me no farther,

  For how I firmly am resolved you know:

  That is, not to bestow my youngest daughter

  Before I have a husband for the elder.

  If either of you both love Katherina,

  Because I know you well and love you well

  Leave shall you have to court her at your pleasure.

  GREMIO

  To cart her rather. She’s too rough for me.

  There, there, Hortensio. Will you any wife?

  KATHERINE (to Baptista)

  I pray you, sir, is it your will

  To make a stale of me amongst these mates?

  HORTENSIO

  ‘Mates’, maid? How mean you that? No mates for

  you

  Unless you were of gentler, milder mould.

  KATHERINE

  I’faith, sir, you shall never need to fear.

  Iwis it is not half-way to her heart,

  But if it were, doubt not her care should be

  To comb your noddle with a three-legged stool,

  And paint your face, and use you like a fool.

  HORTENSIO

  From all such devils, good Lord deliver us.

  GREMIO And me too, good Lord.

  TRANIO (aside to Lucentio)

  Husht, master, here’s some good pastime toward.

  That wench is stark mad or wonderful froward.

  LUCENTIO (aside to Tranio)

  But in the other’s silence do I see

  Maid’s mild behaviour and sobriety.

  Peace, Tranio.

  TRANIO (aside to Lucentio)

  Well said, master. Mum, and gaze your fill.

  BAPTISTA

  Gentlemen, that I may soon make good

  What I have said—Bianca, get you in.

  And let it not displease thee, good Bianca,

  For I will love thee ne’er the less, my girl.

  KATHERINE A pretty peat! It is best

  Put finger in the eye, an she knew why.

  BIANCA

  Sister, content you in my discontent.

  (To Baptista) Sir, to your pleasure humbly I subscribe.

  My books and instruments shall be my company,

  On them to look and practise by myself.

  LUCENTIO (aside to Tranio)

  Hark, Tranio, thou mayst hear Minerva speak.

  HORTENSIO

  Signor Baptista, will you be so strange?

  Sorry am I that our good will effects

  Bianca’s grief.

  GREMIO Why will you mew her up,

  Signor Baptista, for this fiend of hell,

  And make her bear the penance of her tongue?

  BAPTIST

  Gentlemen, content ye. I am resolved.

  Go in, Bianca.

  Exit Bianca

  And for I know she taketh most delight

  In music, instruments, and poetry,

  Schoolmasters will I keep within my house

  Fit to instruct her youth. If you, Hortensio,

  Or, Signor Gremio, you know any such,

  Prefer them hither; for to cunning men

  I will be very kind, and liberal

  To mine own children in good bringing up.

  And so farewell. Katherina, you may stay,

  For I have more to commune with Bianca.

  Exit

  KATHERINE Why, and I trust I may go too, may I not? What, shall I be appointed hours, as though belike I knew not what to take and what to leave? Ha!

  Exit

  GREMIO You may go to the devil’s dam. Your gifts are so good here’s none will hold you. Their love is not so great, Hortensio, but we may blow our nails together and fast it fairly out. Our cake’s dough on both sides. Farewell. Yet for the love I bear my sweet Bianca, if I can by any means light on a fit man to teach her that wherein she delights, I will wish him to her father.

  HORTENSIO So will I, Signor Gremio. But a word, I pray. Though the nature of our quarrel yet never brooked parle, know now, upon advice, it toucheth us both—that we may yet again have access to our fair mistress and be happy rivals in Bianca’s love—to labour and effect one thing specially.

  GREMIO What’s that, I pray?

  HORTENSIO Marry, sir, to get a husband for her sister.

  GREMIO A husband?—a devil!

  HORTENSIO I say a husband.

  GREMIO I say a devil. Think’st thou, Hortensio, though her father be very rich, any man is so very a fool to be married to hell?

  HORTENSIO Tush, Gremio. Though it pass your patience and mine to endure her loud alarums, why, man, there be good fellows in the world, an a man could light on them, would take her with all faults, and money enough.

  GREMIO I cannot tell, but I had as lief take her dowry with this condition: to be whipped at the high cross every morning.

  HORTENSIO Faith, as you say, there’s small choice in rotten apples. But come, since this bar in law makes us friends, it shall be so far forth friendly maintained till by helping Baptista’s eldest daughter to a husband we set his youngest free for a husband, and then have to’t afresh. Sweet Bianca Happy man be his dole. He that runs fastest gets the ring. How say you, Signor Gremio?

  GREMIO I am agreed, and would I had given him the best horse in Padua to begin his wooing that would thoroughly woo her, wed her, and bed her, and rid the house of her. Come on.

  Exeunt Hortensio and Gremio. Tranio and Lucentio remain

  TRANIO

  I pray, sir, tell me : is it possible

  That love should of a sudden take such hold?

  LUCENTIO

  O Tranio, till I found it to be true

  I never thought it possible or likely.

  But see, while idly I stood looking on

  I found the effect of love in idleness,

  And now in plainness do confess to thee,

  That art to me as secret and as dear

  As Anna to the Queen of Carthage was,

  Tranio, I burn, I pine, I perish, Tranio,

>   If I achieve not this young modest girl.

  Counsel me, Tranio, for I know thou canst.

  Assist me, Tranio, for I know thou wilt.

  TRANIO

  Master, it is no time to chide you now.

  Affection is not rated from the heart.

  If love have touched you, naught remains but so—

  Redime te captum quam queas minimo.

  LUCENTIO

  Gramercies, lad. Go forward, this contents.

  The rest will comfort, for thy counsel’s sound.

  TRANIO

  Master, you looked so longly on the maid

  Perhaps you marked not what’s the pith of all.

  LUCENTIO

  O yes, I saw sweet beauty in her face,

  Such as the daughter of Agenor had,

  That made great Jove to humble him to her hand

  When with his knees he kissed the Cretan strand.

  TRANIO

  Saw you no more? Marked you not how her sister

  Began to scold and raise up such a storm

  That mortal ears might hardly endure the din ?

  LUCENTIO

  Tranio, I saw her coral lips to move,

  And with her breath she did perfume the air.

  Sacred and sweet was all I saw in her.

  TRANIO (aside)

  Nay, then ’tis time to stir him from his trance.

  (To Lucentio) I pray, awake, sir. If you love the maid,

  Bend thoughts and wits to achieve her. Thus it

  stands:

  Her elder sister is so curst and shrewd

  That till the father rid his hands of her,

  Master, your love must live a maid at home,

  And therefore has he closely mewed her up

  Because she will not be annoyed with suitors.

  LUCENTIO

  Ah, Tranio, what a cruel father’s he!

  But art thou not advised he took some care

  To get her cunning schoolmasters to instruct her?

  TRANIO

  Ay, marry am I, sir, and now ’tis plotted.

  LUCENTIO

  I have it, Tranio.

  TRANIO

  Master, for my hand,

  Both our inventions meet and jump in one.

  LUCENTIO

  Tell me thine first.

  TRANIO You will be schoolmaster

  And undertake the teaching of the maid.

  That’s your device.

  LUCENTIO

  It is. May it be done?

  TRANIO

  Not possible; for who shall bear your part,

  And be in Padua here Vincentio’s son,

  Keep house, and ply his book, welcome his friends,

  Visit his countrymen, and banquet them?

  LUCENTIO

  Basta, content thee, for I have it full.

  We have not yet been seen in any house,

  Nor can we be distinguished by our faces

  For man or master. Then it follows thus:

  Thou shalt be master, Tranio, in my stead;

  Keep house, and port, and servants, as I should.

  I will some other be, some Florentine,

  Some Neapolitan, or meaner man of Pisa.

  Tis hatched, and shall be so. Tranio, at once

  Uncase thee. Take my coloured hat and cloak.

  When Biondello comes he waits on thee,

  But I will charm him first to keep his tongue.

  TRANIO So had you need.

  [They exchange clothes]

  In brief, sir, sith it your pleasure is,

  And I am tied to be obedient—

  For so your father charged me at our parting,

  ‘Be serviceable to my son,’ quoth he,

  Although I think ’twas in another sense—

  I am content to be Lucentio

  Because so well I love Lucentio.

  LUCENTIO

  Tranio, be so, because Lucentio loves,

  And let me be a slave t’achieve that maid

  Whose sudden sight hath thralled my wounded eye.

  Enter Biondello

  Here comes the rogue. Sirrah, where have you been?

  BIONDELLO Where have I been? Nay, how now, where are you? Master, has my fellow Tranio stolen your clothes, or you stolen his, or both? Pray, what’s the news?

  LUCENTIO

  Sirrah, come hither. ‘Tis no time to jest,

  And therefore frame your manners to the time.

  Your fellow Tranio here, to save my life

  Puts my apparel and my count’nance on,

  And I for my escape have put on his,

  For in a quarrel since I came ashore

  I killed a man, and fear I was descried.

  Wait you on him, I charge you, as becomes,

  While I make way from hence to save my life.

  You understand me?

  BIONDELLO I sir? Ne’er a whit.

  LUCENTIO

  And not a jot of Tranio in your mouth.

  Tranio is changed into Lucentio.

  BIONDELLO

  The better for him. Would I were so too.

  TRANIO

  So could I, faith, boy, to have the next wish after—

  That Lucentio indeed had Baptista’s youngest

  daughter.

  But sirrah, not for my sake but your master’s I advise

  You use your manners discreetly in all kind of

  companies.

  When I am alone, why then I am Tranio,

  But in all places else your master, Lucentio.

  LUCENTIO Tranio, let’s go.

  One thing more rests that thyself execute—

  To make one among these wooers. If thou ask me

  why,

  Sufficeth my reasons are both good and weighty.

  Exeunt

  The presenters above speak

  FIRST SERVINGMAN

  My lord, you nod. You do not mind the play.

  SLY Yes, by Saint Anne do I. A good matter, surely. Comes there any more of it?

  BARTHOLOMEW My lord, ’tis but begun.

  SLY ‘Tis a very excellent piece of work, madam lady. Would ’twere done.

  They sit and mark

  1.2 Enter Petruccio and his man, Grumio

  PETRUCCIO

  Verona, for a while I take my leave

  To see my friends in Padua; but of all

  My best-beloved and approved friend

  Hortensio, and I trow this is his house.

  Here, sirrah Grumio, knock, I say.

  GRUMIO Knock, sir? Whom should I knock? Is there any man has rebused your worship?

  PETRUCCIO Villain, I say, knock me here soundly.

  GRUMIO Knock you here, sir? Why, sir, what am I, sir, that I should knock you here, sir?

  PETRUCCIO

  Villain, I say, knock me at this gate,

  And rap me well or I’ll knock your knave’s pate.

  GRUMIO

  My master is grown quarrelsome. I should knock you

  first,

  And then I know after who comes by the worst.

  PETRUCCIO Will it not be?

  Faith, sirrah, an you’ll not knock, I’ll ring it.

  I’ll try how you can sol-fa and sing it.

  He wrings him by the ears. [Grumio kneels]

  GRUMIO Help, masters, help! My master is mad.

  PETRUCCIO Now knock when I bid you, sirrah villain.

  Enter Hortensio

  HORTENSIO How now, what’s the matter? My old friend Grumio and my good friend Petruccio ? How do you all at Verona?

  PETRUCCIO

  Signor Hortensio, come you to part the fray?

  Con tutto il cuore ben trovato, may I say.

  HORTENSIO Alla nostra casa ben venuto, molto onorato signor mio Petruccio. Rise, Grumio, rise. We will compound this quarrel.

  Grumio rises

  GRUMIO Nay, ‘tis no matter, sir, what he ’leges in Latin. If this be not a lawful cause for me to leave his service-look you, sir: h
e bid me knock him and rap him soundly, sir. Well, was it fit for a servant to use his master so, being perhaps, for aught I see, two-and-thirty, a pip out? Whom would to God I had well knocked at first, Then had not Grumio come by the worst.

  PETRUCCIO

  A senseless villain. Good Hortensio,

  I bade the rascal knock upon your gate,

  And could not get him for my heart to do it.

  GRUMIO Knock at the gate? O heavens, spake you not these words plain? ‘Sirrah, knock me here, rap me here, knock me well, and knock me soundly’ ? And come you now with knocking at the gate?

  PETRUCCIO

  Sirrah, be gone, or talk not, I advise you.

  HORTENSIO

  Petruccio, patience. I am Grumio’s pledge.

  Why this’ a heavy chance ’twixt him and you,

  Your ancient, trusty, pleasant servant Grumio.

  And tell me now, sweet friend, what happy gale

  Blows you to Padua here from old Verona ?

  PETRUCCIO

  Such wind as scatters young men through the world

  To seek their fortunes farther than at home,

  Where small experience grows. But in a few,

  Signor Hortensio, thus it stands with me :

  Antonio, my father, is deceased,

  And I have thrust myself into this maze

  Happily to wive and thrive as best I may.

  Crowns in my purse I have, and goods at home,

  And so am come abroad to see the world.

  HORTENSIO

  Petruccio, shall I then come roundly to thee

  And wish thee to a shrewd, ill-favoured wife?

  Thou‘dst thank me but a little for my counsel,

  And yet I’ll promise thee she shall be rich,

  And very rich. But thou’rt too much my friend,

  And I’ll not wish thee to her.

  PETRUCCIO

  Signor Hortensio, ’twixt such friends as we

  Few words suffice; and therefore, if thou know

  One rich enough to be Petruccio’s wife—

  As wealth is burden of my wooing dance—

  Be she as foul as was Florentius’ love,

  As old as Sibyl, and as curst and shrewd

  As Socrates’ Xanthippe or a worse,

  She moves me not—or not removes at least

  Affection’s edge in me, were she as rough

  As are the swelling Adriatic seas.

  I come to wive it wealthily in Padua;

  If wealthily, then happily in Padua.

  GRUMIO (to Hortensio) Nay, look you, sir, he tells you flatly what his mind is. Why, give him gold enough and marry him to a puppet or an aglet-baby, or an old trot with ne’er a tooth in her head, though she have as many diseases as two-and-fifty horses. Why, nothing comes amiss so money comes withal.